Day two

Day two is almost over. Today my task was to write for 15 minutes, and I also chose a task from the list of extra ones that could be done at any point in the first week, which was to take a different route to work.

Often these days I get quite tired in the mornings. But this morning was different. Maybe it's the fact that summer's approaching and the mornings are getting lighter, or maybe it's the 'diet', but I got straight out of bed not long after Dave. And left the house almost straight away. It felt very good indeed. And I was on track to arrive at work about 75 minutes earlier than usual.

However, a few steps in to the journey and I had to really force myself to go in the OTHER direction from the one I'm used to. A curious mix of emotions occurred as the journey unfolded.

Firstly, it didn't feel like I was going to work somehow. It just felt like - a walk. For fun.
This, I liked.

Secondly, and at the same time, I felt nervous and almost dizzy. Like what happens when you saw open a golf ball. It feels like as I crack open my web of habits, all the elastic bands inside my head are seething. (If you can understand that, you are weirder - and more like me - than I thought. It's great to have you as my friend.)

I started to notice that the new road I was walking down was much more pleasant. I looked at every tree with their beautiful clouds of pink blossoms. I smelled the air. And all the while my subconscious was having what I can only describe as a hissyfit.

Anyhow, as I got to the tube station, I clicked back in to my routine. Then - something else unexpected. I began to observe myself almost from the outside. I noticed I was about to sit down on the normal bench in the same place as usual. I thought - while I'm at it, why don't I break this habit as well? So I sat on a different bench. This added to the feeling of internal petit mal.

By the time I got to task number 2, "write for 15 minutes" - I felt great. Just achieving small things and ticking them off the list is having quite a profound effect on my state of mind. So I decided to write a prayer - something I've not done in quite a while. And carried on for about half an hour.

After both those tasks were finished, I felt a kind of serenity come over me and it stayed with me through the rest of the day. It could be the lovely sun out for most of the day, or it could be the diet, but right now I feel very happy.

I know this 'diet' is going to get a lot harder than this as I progress and have to really break out of my comfort zone, but even if I don't lose any weight, so far, I reckon it's been hugely positive. It could be the placebo effect, but I seem to be more aware of things, especially whether I am truly hungry or thirsty.

All good.

But, man, how I missed TV yesterday evening!